The Completely Harrowing Tale of Two Middle-Aged Women, A Moped and a Daytrip to Nantucket, Part II

So . . . you’re back for more.  Curious on how The Completely Harrowing Tale of Two Middle-aged Women, a Moped and a Daytrip to Nantucket concludes? Well, get comfy – the day is about to take a nosedive.  A detour from the comical, to the surreal.  If you missed the first part of our saga, or need to refresh your memory, you can find it by clicking here: Part One. If you are ready to revel in our misery, then, read away. But don’t say I didn’t warn you. 😜

Born to Be Wild

When last we left you, we were putt, putt, putting around Nantucket on mopeds, feeling like complete badasses in mom jeans and dorky black helmets – Born to Be Wild playing on repeat in our heads. I had finally gotten the hang of turning left so we headed east to ‘Sconset.  I thought a nice stroll along the ‘Sconset Bluff Walk would be a nice treat for my sister, Denise. For those of you unfamiliar with the walk, it’s literally a narrow footpath along a cliff that winds through the backyards of beautiful Nantucket homes.  And though it is a public access way, you can’t help but feel like you are trespassing.  Unless you are me and have an unquenchably nosy nature, then it feels like bliss.

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‘Sconset

So, we arrived safe and sound in ‘Sconset (you’re welcome 😜) and we found and walked the narrow cliff path that meanders between gray shingled homes and ocean. There were beautiful homes on the left, and gorgeous ocean views on the right. One particularly beautiful home actually had a tent propped up with a band warming up and caterers scurrying about preparing for some type of function.  There were wooden stairs at this point that led down to the ocean, so we took them and once on the beach, spread out the blanket we had brought in a backpack.  

We laid there for a bit, enjoying the warm sun on our face, and listening to the distant strains of the band mixed with the sound of crashing waves.  At one point a couple wandered down to the beach beside us, champagne in hand, and we realized the guests must have arrived.  

The guests had arrived . . . 😳

That meant to get back to our moped, we would have to walk back UP the stairs and into the backyard of the house with the band. The house that now had guests. I wish I could clearly paint a picture of what that meant.  This is not like walking behind the estates in Newport, RI, for instance. When I say you are in people’s backyards, I don’t mean that your sort-of in their backyard.  Or that you’re behind a fence that runs along their backyard.  You are literally in their backyard. And this particular backyard was having a function.  A wedding to be exact.  

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And how do I know that? 

Well, because after leaving the beach and standing at the bottom of the wooden stairs we needed to go back up, we could see the guests at the top.  And when we climbed the stairs and “excuse me and pardon me” our way past the beautiful people sipping various cocktails and champagne we could see the bride warmly greeting and welcoming her guests. Part of me wanted to give the ol’ gal a thumbs-up but thought better of it.

We retraced our steps along the footpath and back to the ‘Sconset circle. There we bought an ice cream and then headed back to our trusty moped.  The road to ‘Sconset is pretty much a straight shot, so it was smooth sailing back to town. An early dinner at CRU was next on my agenda and then it would be time to catch the 5:30pm ferry home.

The Case of The Missing Phone

Once in town, we parked the moped and headed towards CRU – stopping at a store to purchase some sweatshirts for the kids.  And folks, that is about when our day took a turn for the worse. 

Why, you ask?

Because once outside the shop, Denise realized she didn’t have her phone.  We searched all our bags, with no luck.  Luckily, we share our location with each other, so I checked my phone to see if it would give me the whereabouts of hers.  It briefly showed it at ‘Sconset, but once it refreshed, it plopped the location pindrop right on top of the store we had just left.  Yay!

We walked around the side of the building to find it closed-up tight.  We had literally just left it, so we knocked on the door.  Loudly.  It caught the attention of a young man sitting across the way. He informed us that the woman who worked there had gone to the bathroom and would be right back.  We waited and sure enough, minutes later, she was back. We told the sales clerk that we suspected Denise had left her phone in the store. I pulled out my phone to show the cashier Denise’s phone’s last location and . . . huh. . .funny . . . it now weirdly said “no location found”.

Despite being a glass-is-half-full person, I knew this wasn’t going to end well. 

The cashier helped us search the store, but nothing.  No phone. 

“We have to go back to ‘Sconset.” Dee looked at me imploringly.

Deep, deep, deep down, I knew that phone was a gonner and that there were two possible scenarios.  

A) The phone was on the road – somewhere – between ‘Sconset and town.  Denise remembered placing the phone under her leg when she jumped onto the moped seat (because, yeah, that’s a safe spot for it 😳) and it could easily have fallen out from under her leg and onto the road.  Or . . .

B) The super helpful clerk that search the entire store actually took the phone, dashed to the bathroom after we left, and shut it off before pocketing it.

I believed one scenario, Denise, another.

Retracing Our Steps

I wistfully looked in the direction of CRU, before heading to the moped.  We drove all the way to ‘Sconset and back. What do you think we found?

Nothing.

Back at the store, we interrogated . . . I mean . . . asked the clerk if the phone had turned up while we were gone.  Nope. I checked my phone again for Denise’s location and tapped her name to check other functions. Interestingly it gave the phone’s last known location as the building across from the store.  

The building with a bathroom.

In my mind, it was clear what had happened (see scenario B, above) but despite significant evidence, we couldn’t be 100% certain. So, there was no finger-pointing or direct questioning.  Just a few words to the clerk, hoping that she would have a change of heart and call the number we left her once the phone was “found”.  

We left the store and with stomachs growling, headed to Cru only to find it completely full. Booked solid.

Of course, it was.

Denise felt bad and kept thinking she ruined the day, but nothing could be further from the truth. Except for the lost phone, the day had been perfect. I was still feeling the warm buzzy feeling that accompanies happiness, so we walked along the beautiful Nantucket Boat Basin and passed by yachts four stories high. The sun was setting spectacularly.  It had been a beautiful day and now a gorgeous night. Puttering around the island had been so much fun, but it was time to head back.  We missed the 5:30 ferry but intended to catch the last one to Hyannis at 8. Returning to the moped, we took it for one last drive back to the shop.

Closed

Say wah?

How can it be closed???  I pulled out the contract – sure enough, it said that it closed at 5. 😅😅😅  Surely there had to be an after-hours key drop? And yes, after looking closely there WAS a slot in the door but based on the website and contract, that was for people returning bikes, not mopeds. 

We tried calling the phone number.  No answer. We left a message.  We called the police, because good Lord, we couldn’t be the first people to return a moped late???  Could we?? According to the Nantucket PD, this was a first. They had never heard about something like this happening before and didn’t know how to guide us. BUT . . . if we were going to leave the moped, make sure it wasn’t parked illegally.

Good advice. 

So once again, we were looking at two scenarios:

C) Find a hotel room and pay the extremely reasonable $1795.00 to stay overnight or . . .

D) Park the moped outside the shop, hang the helmets from the handlebars, drop the key in the slot and PRAY no one steals the moped and helmets.

I NORMALLY wouldn’t have had any problem with scenario “D” (Nantucket has a very low crime rate), but with the whole phone debacle, I thought it probably wasn’t a great idea to assume the moped would be safe.

Enter Pizza Guys. Not all Superheroes Wear Capes

While I left Dee with my phone to see if she could find another number to call, I walked to a pizza parlor that was two doors down from the Moped rental shop. Without going into the whole phone saga, I asked them if they knew what someone should do if they returned late with a moped.  They told me to just keep it and return it in the morning.  I gritted my teeth.

“Yes. Thank you.  But you see, we are leaving on the 8pm ferry.”

The pizza guys all looked at each other.  “Oh man.  Yeah.  That’s a bummer.”

Thank you so much.  So helpful.

I’m about to leave when one of the guys stops me.

“Hey – go two more doors down” He points to another pizza shop.  “All those guys work at the moped place during the day.”

So, to make a long story short, we basically left the moped with a guy that worked at the 2nd pizza joint based on the recommendation of a guy that worked at the 1st.  If that isn’t sound logic right there, I don’t know what is.  

I fully expected there to be a $1500 charge on my credit card the next morning. Reimbursement for 1 missing moped. Out of the two scenarios, it was cheaper than an overnight stay so that’s the scenario we went with. 😂😂😂

A Penny for Brandt Point

We boarded the 8pm ferry, waved bye-bye to the phone (where ever it was), and threw a penny into the ocean as we rounded Brandt Point (to ensure a return to the Island). Then we made the long drive home. The next morning, when I woke to see a $30 late-return fee from the moped shop pop up on my phone notifications, I dropped to my knees and thanked the heavens above. One thing had actually gone right.

So that’s our harrowing tale. We never did recover the phone and Denise ended out buying a new one the next day. On the ferry ride home, Dee kept apologizing over and over.  Because of the phone mishap, we missed dinner at Cru, missed the ferry, and had to drop off the moped hoping it wouldn’t be stolen. I just laughed in return.  It was a great day, I reassured her.  I got to spend a wonderful day, on the island I love, with my sister. 

And besides, this is the type of stuff that happens to me, so it’s refreshing when it happens to someone else. 🤪

– Darlene

(To read the first part of this tale – click here: PART 1)